This story was shared by a friend. The Writer is Editor Awais, A pakistan resident, but his story is similar to our life. How many of your parents had to do tough jobs to pay fees. I know mine did. Read on.  One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview,made the last decision. The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic
achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary schooluntil the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.
The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?" the
youth answered "none".
The director asked, " Was it your father who paid for your school fees?" The youth answered, "My father passed away when I was one yearold, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.The director asked, " Where did your mother work?" The youth answered,"My mother worked as clothes cleaner.
The director requested the youth to show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect.
The director asked, " Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?" The youth answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me. The director said, "I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother's hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.*
The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the kid.
The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.
This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother's hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.
After finishing the cleaning of his mother hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his
mother.That night, mother and son talked for a very long time. Next morning, the youth went to the director's office.The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: " Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"
The youth answered, " I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes' The Director asked, " please tell me your feelings."The youth said, Number 1, I know now what is appreciation.
Without my mother, there would not the successful me today. Number 2, by working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done. Number 3, I have come to
appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.
The director said, " This is what I am looking for to be my manager.I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.
Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every employee worked diligently and as a team.The company's performance improved tremendously.
A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop "entitlement mentality" and would always put himself first. He would be ignorant of his parent's efforts. When he
starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others.For this kind of people, who may be good
academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we destroying the kid instead?*
You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch a big screen TV. But when you
are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them in a right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person. The most important thing is your kid
learns how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things done.
You would have forwarded many mails to many and many of them would have back mailed you too...but try and forward this story to as many as possible...this may change somebody's fate...
Stay blessed.
 The first sight told me she will be the one for me. The fireworks in my loins, the sweat in my palms and the never ending directed stare was my first response to her physical beauty as she walked to lead the choir. I was invited to the Kenyan church by my friend Kevin, who frequented the church for spiritual nourishment, though he was not saved, he believed from his birth, he was a Christian and therefore needed to attend services. “I am a Christian, and my church understands my lifestyle, he said. I knew I would be welcomed here if Kevin, a dare devil drunkard womaniser could find solace in this church.
I was not expecting to find an angel but the moment Esther opened her mouth to sing, I was hooked. By all means, I cannot bear if she was married! That thought almost made me shout out loud! NO! This is it, Love at odd places. The service finished and I found myself blindly walking past all men and women of God towards Esther. She was looking my way, thinking she was intended to hug me, she moved passed me and hugged a dear brother while I awkwardly had my hands in the air! This is bad! Embarrassing but not as much as when she asked me, “CAN I HELP YOU? Of course you can, marry me I thought, but what came out was “You look absolutely adorable and had to say hi, I am Michael, I said. She gave me a beautiful smile that I considered the start of our relationship.
Days that followed were challenging. As we dated, she was finding information about me that I kinda liked to be kept in the past, whereas she seemed not to have a dot on her name. How can a 28 year old woman be spotless?
Well we dated and got married 7 months down the line after I had cleaned up my acts completely. I had changed myself completely to have her required qualities. I stopped everything I liked to do everything she liked and that made her very happy!
After honeymoon the drama started! She was not the sweet girl with a sweet chilling voice anymore. She became a commanding monster, a demanding, nagging commodity and just a nightmare to live with day in day out.I became the maid, a taxi to her many fashion expos, the extended family breadwinner that I even took second shift to manage her thrifty spending. With all this I had to book a fortnight, if lucky, to get my conjugal rights! OOH MY! My life had taken a nasty turn and the one angelic diamond had turned to be an evil calculator of women rights. Basically the marriage was a downright flop!
Yes, God got me right. All the nasty things I did to women were repaid by this one woman that I Love to bits. All the women I cheated on, the unwanted pregnancies, the ones I broke their heart, all have been avenged. I have become a slave to the one person I cannot live without. Now she is expecting our first child and believe me you, I even wash her feet before she sleeps! This is a match made in Heaven! God planned for me to suffer in Love as those who suffered under my youthful don’t care attitudes! I am staying in it to pay my dues, so fellas, no divorce for us! I am happy to slave under my Love! I have been reduced to a level I could not have envisioned! She will change, when I have paid all my Love debt, I think!
 Workout sessions and exercises is the new trend for all fashonista and trendy divas. Some have even made a workout routine that involves their household vicinity but more women are paying handsomely for gym sessions and training instructors. Although highly fashionable, there are many excuses that we use to get out of a workout session - I am not feeling, I am so tired, there is no time, it’s too expensive etc.
Believe it or not, for ethnic women, the top reason why they do not want to use the gym is their hair issues. Skipping the gym so you do not mess up your hair? You might think it’s stupid until you know the cost of some of the hair extensions. How can a gym
session compare to a £200 worth Brazilian extensions or come from a perming session, well set hair to a sweaty smelly gym session that will involve washing your hair after. I am sure I am not the only one that thinks of hair first before gym but for us black women, its not an option. We are stuck up with diets in order to maintain a trendy hair style.
The obsession with fake hair has reached another high level. Average women are spending more that £300 each month to power their hair look and competion are on who has the best hair extension. I have long beautiful permed hair which can be set to different styles but I do feel cheap and inadequate when faced with the synthentic hair frenzy. Saying that, they do enhance the look so, lets just say the gym can wait!
 You are so perfect for each other! You always look so happy, what is the secret? Those couples looking so vibrant to the world is because they have learnt to make it work! They have issues too that would make your issues look like baby issues but they have, individually, made a choice to work on their relationship for better or worse.
In a world where everyman for himself and God for us all, it seems that we are not in a compromising era. The phrase forgive and forget does not appear in the dot.com relationship. You mess it and just like that, your relationship is gone. You get forgiven and it will appear in any argument after that!
How many people do you know that sticks in abusive relationship, showing smiley faces to the world yet they live in misery and takes so much rubbish in their life? Have you been cheated on? have you been washed clean of your finances? have you been raped? have you been beaten? have you been given cold war? Where do you strike a balance of I have had enough? Or when do you say: this is nothing, I can take it!
I am not only talking about romantic relationship, it could be employer /employee, business, friendships or any collaboration that involve working together to a common goal. Yes, I know employees who leave a job because of a simple arguments that could have been settled with “I am sorry” or divorced couple that cannot even remember the hype about their divorce because the rushed into it. Others were bearing it all until they become fully dysfunctional, they stayed in too much.
Do not throw the towel too early in anything you engage in. Also deal with things when they happen. Bottling issues only allows for bigger explosions. Today I am dealing with such an emotion, where I have to make a decision on how to deal with an issue in a balanced and effective way and it’s difficult. When the emotions are raw, when the hurt is fresh, then it’s hard to see past it. In all this, I know the outcome I want, in this collaborative relationship, hence I need to find solutions to a problem that will allow a continuity of a working
relationship.
All that glitters is not gold. Copper can be coated in Gold. Polished image is what many successful relationships present to the world. Never presenting their problems, because it’s not a problem if you are dealing with it, it’s a challenge. As I deal with mine today, I hope you my readers will feel obliged to go and tackle those challenges facing your day to day relationships. Remember there is nothing like Perfect relationship as there are no two individuals who can agree on everything 100% all the time. Its Compromise, Respect and Love that keeps many able to function with a glittery coat of gold.
 I was born here. Molo. For twenty years we lived happily. Went to school together, ate together, farmed together and married each other. That was the anti tribal Kenya I Know and Love. Now the story is different, the tribal hatred is out of order and us in the Diaspora have the ability to bring the old love back. Encourage our families and friends to vote with their brains, not their tribe, their pockets and their adrenaline. Tribalism is worse than racism, bacause it is usually personalized and directed to those you know!
"YOU DIED IN MY SCROTUM, MY DAUGHTER | by Barasa Ongeti
"To my daughter who will never be born”
You will never be born because you died in my scrotum. You died in my scrotum because I was killed. I was killed because I didn’t vote for them. I didn’t vote for them because I wasn’t their tribe. I wasn’t their tribe because they taught us about“ Watu Wetu“.They taught us about WatuWetu because they wanted votes, from us Watu Wao. And we fought and raped and killed in their name and sang “ Tuko Pamoja“. After the prayer rally, I trekked in my yellow vuta pumz sandals to my slum house, while he rode in Yves Saint Laurent leather shoes, cosy on the floor mat of his Land-something V6 to his palace right across the road, in Karen. I still sang ‘ Tuko
Pamoja‘. I couldn’t eat supper that night because I didn’t have any. Besides, if I did, I didn’t have salt. I could have borrowed salt, but in 2008 I killed my neighbor, who used to lend me salt; although he was not Watu Wetu, he still used to lend me salt. In fact they used to use it to flavor the bacon they bought from the money they stole that was meant to take you, my daughter, to school. You will never go to school anyway, because you died in my scrotum.You died in my scrotum because my neighbor’s sons came to kill me. My neighbor’s sons came to kill me because in 2008, I killed their father while I was cheering Watu Wetu and he was cheering Watu Wao. I wish I had learnt early enough that the real Watu Wetu are the ones from whom I borrowed chumvi from when I had none. The real Watu Wetu didn’t need votes so that they could fatten their bellies. The real Watu Wetu are the ones who would have pushed your mother on a wheelbarrow to the slum dispensary when she was about to birth you. But you will never be born, you died in my scrotum. I know you do not understand anything about Watu Wetu, or why I sang for him Tuko Pamoja yet I lived in a slum and he lives in a palace. You will never understand these things because you are a new breed. You are a breed called Kenyan. Your tribe doesn’t matter; your second name doesn’t matter. Nothing matters anyway, and you will never understand; because you died in my scrotum when my neighbour’ssons killed me because I killed my neighbour.( www.kenyaspirants.com)
 You have seen stories where someone took a bullet for another, a mum died saving a child, giving a kidney for another to live or even parents in Africa denying themselves basic things to pay fees for children! this is the Easter spirit. It’s Easter Period, time to celebrate death and rise of Jesus. Many supermarket capitalizing on chocolate sales like never before and kids hunting for the Easter egg right left and centre. Yes, the spirit is there, but what spirit?
It’s all about sacrifices, being selfless, with the ability to think of others first, even in difficult and painful situations. Altruistic
behaviour is one of the major reasons for choosing a mate.
Developing the concern for the welfare of others while in a difficult circumstances shows a deep understanding of God’s love. . This is a virtue expected from all traditional backgrounds, cultures and even religions. An altruistic person would give without expecting benefits or compensations.
So how altruistic are you?
We are presented situations where our we can show our altruistic personality but many of us do have some second thoughts. We record situations where we were nice to somebody, where we gave our possessions, our services, our assets or even or finances hoping that that will be reciprocated. If the person does not reciprocate, there comes some animosity. “Can you imagine, I did this and that for them and they did not even....”, I am
always there for them but they are never there for me” or they have been taking me for a fool....
All these lamentations do not look like you served the person with one heart. It looks like you served expecting returns and when returns did not arrive, frustrations resulted. Yes, we are mostly expecting to be treated special by others but do we ever have the plan to treat others in a special way?
There is a need of a shift from the culture of receiving to a culture of giving. If you want to believe you are a
Christian and you are emulating the life of Jesus, then as Christians people need to give unconditional love, care and support for those in need. Happiness occur knowing that you served. Christianity is not the belief (which is a brain activity) It’s about actions, a lifestyle that suggest you have the deliverance. Proclaiming the love of God through actions is the best way to showcase your faith
I am a wishing all of you readers a Happy Easter, be a giver today, in your community, in your marriage, in your
family, with your friends, at work, to the country. Be the symbol of Easter, sacrifice yourself to the benefit of others!
 Scientist are at the verge of a breakthrough on their research of a safe hormonal male contraception, which if successful, will
eliminate the need for the female to be the only one liable to planning the family. The female contraceptive are highly effective in controlling birth and many women are now in control of the number of children they want. Men have always been reluctant to be in charge of birth control. Non hormonal contraceptive are available like Condoms and Vasectomy but they are rarely used, especially Vasectomy. Ask a man to have vasectomy, even if they have 10 kids, many will not take the offer.
Some women are allergic to pills; some will miss taking the pills due to hectic lifestyles. With the world pupolation increasing exponentially and the economy frustrating most of us, It would be helpful to know that it’s a collective effort to stop pregnancy. Those who like to stray usually get caught when their mistresses conceive. This would be a thing of the past!
Comments recieved via Facebook page on this topic
Njeri Mum Eric Hell no what I'd he forgot to take n assumes its ok n forget to mention Gitonga Wa M'Mukira Mmmmh sisemi kitu(no comment) Njeri Mum Eric Meant what if * Gitonga Wa M'Mukira First, they said they have developed a method whereby women can conceive and have babies without men. Tukanyamaza. Then they put in place a campaign for male vasectomy, telling us that it was the future of birth control. We laughed scornfully. Now, they have developed a birth control pill for men! And guys you still think this is a joke? You can't see where this is heading? Be afraid. Very afraid Stanley Ngugi Wainaina thats like riding a bike without a break on the highway and believing you can use an on coming vehicle as you brakes. waaaaai!!!! James J Jaymo I cant imagine myself swallowing those tablets! Njeri Mum Eric N if they want to name so n so or start son hunting they will ignore all together Scolastica Wanjiku OOh hell NO NO Janet Africanacts Wainaina Gitonga Wa M'Mukira and stan....Hilarious Mswati George Y not? me use condums without a fuss...how many women use femidom?
 Church is a place you get unconditional love, where your needs are met, where people experience peace and grace beyond measure, where the sick are healed. Many Pastors are surely a blessing to their community for the variety of services they render and for their undying effort to promote spiritual growth among us. Yes, we cannot do without the Pastors. Why then, are many children of the Pastors very bitter? Are the spiritual pastors socially disconected? Too much a pastor than a dad? Joseph shares his story with UKENTV.
JOSEPH`S STORY.
I am a pastors Son and I had to share this story because I am so frustrated. All my life I have done what my parents wanted, especially my Dad. I am the first born in my Family and I was born when my Dad and mum had been married for one year. He was a church member then but when I was 3, He started his own church. Then my mum gave birth to my twin sisters. Things changed.
While before he was a fun dad, he had time for me and mum. When he became a pastor, everything was different. We always had people in our house, for prayers, organizing conferences and others just wanted dinner. When I was six, I was the one playing drums in the church. I had to be in church practising as they prayed, and even most times, I got in trouble for not doing homework as we had been so busy over weekends nobody remembered. When i was not serving `God’, I was busy babysitting my sisters as my mum practised for choir. This was an endless cycle.
My relationship with my Dad changed when I was 12 as I could not keep being his servant. I wanted to go for a film with friends; he wanted me to go and play drums or just serve them and his groups of Pastors. When i wanted to go for a school trip, he had a conference organized! I watched my childhood pass by. When other kids had fun things to share of what they did with their parents, I was quite because i had nothing to say. Most of the church meetings did not address me. They were so spiritual and full on that i just did not connect. My mum had no say as she is the pastor’s wife. We now had money as Dad was going for trips and he had other pastors under him. They spent endless time in our house discussing money, conferences and projects.
One day when 16 I refused to go to a church meeting. He started shouting saying I am in a gang and I lost it! I told him off, told him he is a Gang leader! He just thinks of money! His church does not even like people in our community that goes to other churches; he did not even know who I am, what I like or even who my teacher was! He could not take it. He hit me and I left home. I was taken care of by my mum’ sister.
I am 18 now, working but very bitter. I lost my child hood. I do not even like to think about it. My sisters are now going through the same thing as they are 13. Why do Pastors do this? why do they assume the kids will just understand?
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